Steaming Hot Slice of Life

Drinking on Oil Islands

2008-06-19T12:27:00.000-07:00

Ok, so this is posted kinda late...here's my latest District Weekly "Drink of the Week" column:

Honey Moon Summer Ale

Spandex bike shorts- rock on!

Channeling Sammy Hagar at Joe's Crab Shack

2008-05-02T14:20:00.001-07:00

My District Weekly Drink of the Week column this week:

Captain's Dreamscicle

Drinking tall fruities at "The Shack."

Feeling Fluty in Long Beach

2008-04-17T10:37:00.000-07:00

Long Beach is a diverse city. Just blocks away, row upon row of peeling 1920’s craftsman houses, cafes, gangs, Cambodian restaurants, vintage shops, taquerias, seedy bars lined with career alcoholics, four star dining establishments and a freaking aquarium intermingle in an fusion of culture. Where we live by the beach, it’s not so dangerous. People rollerblade around and talk about sailboats. Sometimes at night, we’re woken up by our neighbor who plays a recorder really loudly out his open window. What kind of a guy plays a fucking flute at two am? Last night it happened again, and my boyfriend leaned out the window and yelled, “More recorder!” If you can’t stop it, you might as well have some fun. We started shouting out song requests--anything we could think of with a flute. “Men at Work! Play Bungle in the Jungle!” we shouted.

The most we got was some fluty noodling in return. What a hack. We called that flute player out.

"Jeans for Jesus"

2008-03-12T23:45:00.000-07:00

Another shameless plug for my column in The District this week:

Sale Salvation

Happy VD!

2008-02-13T01:17:00.000-08:00

For those a little tired of the old candy and flowers route, try love urban style, and check out my "Drink of the Week" column in The District this week...Chamcisco!

Chamcisco

It means whale’s vagina...

2007-09-11T00:36:00.001-07:00

We went out of town to San Diego on a whim and, as luck will have it, there was a skate/snowboard dealer event going on that weekend. Needless to say, our hotel overlooked an elaborate A&R tiki party with a mechanical bull and a giant, erupting volcano. You just can't plan this shit. It was hilarious to watch the young, A&R rep hopefuls getting wasted and lasting 1.5 seconds on the mechanical bull before being tossed into the air and splatting onto the mat. Then, oddly, there were dancing cheerleaders that did a choreographed pop and lock to Paula Abdul on the makeshift parquet floor. Until the nerdy guys started closing in on them, taking pictures and trying to hug them.

Somehow, for me, this sums up San Diego.

OC Fair - 8/3/07

2007-08-04T09:34:00.000-07:00

Is that what makes us want to hang, a thin seatbelt away from death,
feet dangling over crowds of fried-food-bellied pedestrians below...
because walking, driving, passing through the streets of southern
California, you're already in a sort of consumer death....

If you can wind your way through the prison thugs, drugs, endless
watering holes, a fast food landscape, then surely you can survive
this, a mechanical failing, nothing compared to the real thing.

Somehow being lifted away, through halfway into space, the plastic
signs become smaller, the heart larger, faster, and we're a little
more alive in southern California.

We're smiling too...

2007-07-19T11:24:00.000-07:00

Another case against high-waisted pants...

Journey, circa 70's

"Our Nation Has New Hope for Glory"

2007-07-11T02:14:00.000-07:00

Or, "I like Nitrates."

Repost from Nathan's Famous Hot Dog Website:

Chestnut Beats Kobayashi, Brings Mustard Yellow Belt Back to America

7/4/2007

Joey Chestnut of San Jose, Calif., today won the Nathan’s Famous Fourth of July International Hot Dog Eating Contest, beating former champion Takeru Kobayashi and setting a new world record by downing 66 Nathan’s Famous hot dogs and buns in 12 minutes.

Kobayashi, the six-time hot dog-eating world champion, arrived at the 2007 event with a jaw injury. He reportedly received therapy on the jaw until two hours before the contest and appeared to compete at 100 percent — he ate 63 HDBs, eight more than his personal best.

Many thought Kobayashi would be unable to compete, or that he would compete at a lower level of intensity. In fact, he and Joey were neck and neck until the final moments of the contest.

The Nathan’s Famous Fourth of July International Hot Dog-Eating Contest has been held each year since 1916, according to archives. This year’s contest may have been the most highly anticipated match-up in the event’s storied 92-year history. Police reported that nearly 50,000 people attended the event in Coney Island.

“Nothing represents summer and the Fourth of July like the Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog-Eating Contest,” said Wayne Norbitz, president and COO of Nathan’s Famous. “This year our nation has new hope for glory.”

I will now shout my pride from the eaves.

Fireworks guys know how to party

2007-07-04T00:01:00.000-07:00

My dream job is to be one of the people who name fireworks...

They must be having a lot of fun in those warehouses...

And let's not forget the infamous "Golden Shower Cone."
The "Screamin Willy."
The "Nutty Monkey."

Someone gets paid to come up with these.

Though sometimes, I suppose, you have to throw Americans a bone...

Golden shower of sparks, I salute you.

From the Advertising Think Tanks...

2007-07-03T10:16:00.000-07:00

Finally, an ad campaign we can relate to...

A research project for the masses...

Presidents in a Block of Cheese

2007-07-01T13:08:00.000-07:00

The Mount Rushmore of Cheddar...my patriotism mounts...

Cut and paste for more info on this natural wonder... (clicky link is down):

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/6258058.stm

Deep Thought of the Week

2007-06-29T14:27:00.000-07:00

I took a road trip to Durango, Colorado last week. Somewhere in Arizona along the I-40, I saw a decrepit tin shack along the highway with a giant sign advertising:

"VASECTOMIES REVERSED."

Stop off for a coffee and while you're there, well, why not take care of that reverse vasectomy you've been meaning to get?

My thought is that if someone is dumb enough to get their vasectomy reversed in a dilapidated shack on Route 40... maybe they shouldn't be reproducing anyway.

Perhaps I'm just being cynical...maybe this is just modern efficiency? A beverage and a ball patch for the road.

I'm Speechless...

2007-06-25T15:03:00.000-07:00

The Canadian Skatt Bros. assembled in 1979, supposedly as the straight answer to the Village People...we're still quivering with delight.

"Hot as a love-struck filly filly"